Football’s Worst Kits


With the new football season rapidly approaching, a wave of fresh optimism immerses every football fan ‘this season will be better than the last’. It’s at this time of year that our football clubs, the length and breadth of the country launch new kits for the forth-coming season. Star players will be parading the new strips on cat walks and fashion shoots, there will be gimmicks and there will be unique selling points – Arsenal and Aston Villa’s new home shirts are made entirely from recycled plastic bottles, Liverpool’s 3rd strip is controversially blue and Fulham are launching a new skin tight shirt based on the template of recent AS Roma and Italy shirts.

Unfortunately kit makers don’t seem to make shirts anymore that go down in the annals of history as major fashions faux-pas. The home strips remain largely consistent, with minimal creativity being reserved for the away or 3rd strip. Focus is placed on incorporating the name of the sponsor and technology that helps to improve acceleration, explosive power and air flow to the skin.

Although the horror strip has become something of a rarity, fortunately in the 1990’s, the decade of the dungarees, MC Hammer trousers and neon coloured clothing, football kit designers and marketing departments had licence to put any clashing colours together to help flog their wares.

This blog is all about celebrating those ‘horrors’, the monstrosities that still haunt your club to this day, from the ‘decade that style forgot’. There’s also one or two blunders from the last few years for good measure.

So here is 10 of the worst or best in my opinion, and I would love your comments on some others that I might have missed out. (Click on the images to get a better look)

Celtic – away 1991-1992

Celtic, absolutely synonymous with the classic green and white hoops, yet when it comes to away strips they get a little creative. Unfortunately this away shirt from the early 90’s, with the downward zig zag, resembling the fall in Fords stock market value or possibly the outline of the Grampian mountains didn’t match the quality of their home shirt. Combining  pistachio green and brown, this shirt that was due to run for 2 seasons was unceremoniously ditched after just 1 season.

Hull City – home 1992-1993

Designer: “What’s your club’s nickname?” Chairman: “The Tigers.” Designer: “Right, that’ll do.” In a ground-breaking moment in football fashion, Hull unveiled a Tiger-skin shirt in 1992. Nothing of its like has been seen since, although perhaps it inspired some of the outfits worn by Spice Girl Mel B.

Norwich City – home 1992-1994

This early 90’s shocker was affectionately known by fans as the ‘bird poo’ kit, pretty apt considering the team are nicknamed the Canaries. Norwich wore the shirt for consecutive season, which were the first two of the newly formed Premier League giving the shirt and instant place in the collective football memory.

Barcelona – away 1994-1995

Turquoise, a colour rarely seen in football shirts, yet regularly used by Barcelona and often to good effect, but this effort from the mid 90’s, worn under the stewardship of Johann Cruyff and adorned by greats such as Hristo Stoichkov, Romario and Luis Figo did match the quality on the pitch. The turquoise blocks on the front of the shirt resembling some sort of Pablo Picasso tribute, done to poor effect.

Notts County away 1994-1995

Notts County were dropping through the leagues like a stone and this kit did little to improve the morale of fans. A tartan ensemble, with little relation the clubs history did not prove much of a hit on the terraces. Quite why a club 150 miles south of Hadrian’s Wall decided to adopt the Scottish look remains a mystery.

Chelsea – away 1994-1996

Chelsea have had there fair share of stinkers over the last few years. The fluorescent away strip from 2 seasons past, that resembled a cycling jacket was pretty horrific, but this away shirt from the mid 90’s is comfortably their worst. It’s rare you see orange and grey come together – club legends Dennis Wise and Ruud Gullit must grimace seeing pictures of themselves in this shirt.

England (goalkeeper) – away – 1995-1996

The first time an England goalkeeper had worn all red since the glory of 1966 and this was the result – David Seaman looked like a traffic light or a poor mans clown in this kit. In an era where goalkeeper shirts got gradually more and more outrageous, this shirt marked the tipping point with all subsequent England goalkeeper shirts being plain. Only ever worn on three occasions, most famously during England 5-6 penalty shoot out defeat to Germany at Euro ’96, the kit will always be remembered.

Manchester United – away 1995-1996

3-0 to Southampton on an overcast spring morning at ‘The Dell’ in 1996 Sir Alex Ferguson made his team change strip at half time to a blue and white ensemble claiming that the players couldn’t see each other properly, due to colour of the shirt blending in with the crowd. As excuses go, its up there as one of the more far fetched for a poor performance, but it guarantees this shirt a place on in football folklore.

Newcastle United – away 2009-2010

After suffering the humiliation of relegation from the Premier League, Newcastle announced the arrival of their new strip for their promotion push and campaign in the Championship. Most fans expected a classic, understated shirt after the failures of the previous season but this striped, canary yellow was anything but. Fortunately Newcastle went on to win the Championship at a canter so fans will have happy memories to associate with this garish piece. 

Everton – away 2010-2011

Pink or magenta officially is  a colour that doesn’t always find itself translated well in the macho image of football, so it was quite a surprise when Everton released their away strip for last season. The science behind it, is such that Everton believed their players would be more visible to each other in their peripheral vision. It remains to be seen if other teams will copy this approach, yet it is highly unlikely.

WHAT IS THE WORST KIT OF ALL TIME?

Let me know in the comment box below


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Greatest manager of all time?


Choosing the best footballer of all time. Easy. Ask a terrace full of football fans that question and half will answer you Pele, the other half Maradona, then toss a coin between the two. Neither answer would be controversial. One day in the near future Lionel Messi might join that shortlist, but for now it’s a pretty straight forward either or debate. Ask who is the greatest manager of all time however and you end up with a shortlist of at least 50.

A great player will always find their way to the top of the game, win the biggest prizes and deliver on the biggest stage, but for a manager it can be an all together different story. Sir Matt Busby, Bill Shankly, Bob Paisley, Brian Clough nor Jose Mourinho have ever taken a team to a World Cup, the biggest prize of them all, in fact very few of the ‘greatest’ have, and them that have won the World Cup are still not regarded as legends of the game. Vincente Del Bosque, Luis Scolari and Aime Jacquet don’t make the shortlist of many as the best that history has to offer.

So what is the criteria by which you measure a managers ability? Do you measure success strictly in accordance with the number of trophies in the cabinet? If so Sir Alex Ferguson is probably your answer? Or do you push for the great one club men like Bob Paisley or Sir Matt Busby, who won everything the domestic game had to offer with the club they loved? Do you go for those who have proved they can succeed almost anywhere, with any club like Fabio Capello, Jose Mourinho and Giovanni Trapattoni? Do you give bonus points for the games great thinkers and tactical innovators like Rinus Michels, Johann Cruyff, Ernst Happel and Arsene Wenger? Do you look for a manager who built a club from nothing and created a legacy, an institution long after their passing, such as Bill Shankly at Liverpool and Brian Clough at Nottingham Forest? How do you quantify the success of someone like John Toshack, who took Swansea City from the 4th division of English football to the top flight in only four years and then went on to win La Liga with Real Madrid? You would find few who would give him a mention in the ‘all time’ greatest list, but his achievements deserve consideration.

Anyway, I’m not going to attempt to decide who is the ‘greatest manager of all time’. But, I would like to open up the debate and canvas comment and opinion. So here’s a shortlist of 10, with their achievements in no order other than alphabetical.

Please leave your thoughts and comments at the bottom of the page.

Sir Matt Busby

If club building scores highly than Sir Matt Busby is up there, for building up Manchester United, then rebuilding them after the Munich air disaster in which he nearly lost his own life. Busby laid the foundations for the success Manchester United currently enjoy, youth development, the expansion and improvement of Old Trafford and winning trophies. He also managed to enjoy spells as a player for Manchester United’s two greatest rivals, Liverpool and Manchester City.

Honours

European Cup x 1

English First Division x 5

FA Cup x 2

FA Charity Shield x 5

Brian Clough

If Brian Clough were making this list I’m sure there would be no debate as to who is the greatest. ’The best English manager, England never had’ made do with taking unknown clubs Derby County and Nottingham Forest from the depths of the Second Division to becoming champions of England. With Nottingham Forest he managed to win consecutive European Cups, the FA Cup always eluded him though, as well as the England job.

Honours

European Cup x 2

European Super Cup x 1

English First Division x 2

English League Cup x 4

FA Charity Shield x 1

English Second Division x 1

Inter League Cup x 1

Sir Alex Ferguson

After knocking over the Old Firm in Scotland, Sir Alex Ferguson headed south to take over the reins at Manchester United. In his 25 years in Lancashire, Manchester United have dominated English football in an era of success only matched by Liverpool’s in the 1970’s and 1980’s. A giant of football, Ferguson is desperate to add a third European Cup to his CV and cement his place as the most successful manager of all time.

Honours

Sir Alex Ferguson 'treble in 1999' of the FA Premier League, FA Cup & UEFA Champions League.

UEFA Champions League x 2

UEFA Cup Winners Cup x 2

FIFA World Club Cup x 2

European Super Cup x 2

FA Premier League x 12

Scottish Premier League x 3

FA Cup x 5

English League Cup x 4

FA Charity / Community Shield x 9

Scottish Cup x 4

Scottish League Cup x 1

Bella Guttman

Bella Guttman is credited with creating the ‘cult’ of the manager, pioneering the attacking 4-2-4 formation which heavily influenced the development of Portuguese and Brazilian football. He won successive European Cups with Benfica and is described as the ‘true special one’ by Jose Mourinho.

Bela Gutmann and Eusebio after capturing the 1960/61 European Cup.

Honours

European Cup x 2

Portuguese Primeira Liga x 3

Hungarian NBI League x 2

Portuguese Cup x 1

Hungarian Cup x 1

Sao Paulo State Championship x 1

Ernst Happel

Ernst Happel won the domestic league in 4 countries (Germany, Holland, Belgium & Austria) as well as winning 2 European Cups, with unfashionable Hamburg & Feyenoord. In 1978 he led Holland to the FIFA World Cup Final, where they narrowly lost in extra time to host nation Argentina.

Honours

UEFA European Cup x 2

Ernst Happel with the European Cup and Bundesliga trophy which he won with Hamburg 1982/83.

FIFA Intercontinental Cup x 1

German Bundesliga x 2

Dutch Eredivisie x 1

Belgian Pro League x 3

Austrian Bundesliga x 2

German Cup x 1

Dutch Cup x 1

Belgian Cup x 2

Belgian Super Cup x 1

Austrian Cup x 1

Rinus Michels

According to FIFA, Rinus Michels is the greatest of them all, being awarded the ‘coach of the century’ award in 1999, which naturally has only been won once. Michels is credited with the invention of one the greatest tactical innovations: total football – where each player is comfortable playing in any other players position, creating attacking, fast flowing football. This philosophy helped him guide the Dutch national team to winning the 1988 European Championships as well as narrowly losing the 1974 FIFA World Cup Final to host nation West Germany. Michels won domestic titles in Spain and Holland as well as winning the European Cup with Ajax in 1971.

Rinus Michels with the Henri Delaunay after winning the European Championships with Holland in 1988.

Honours

UEFA European Championships x 1

European Cup x 1

Inter-Cities Fairs Cup x 1

Spanish La Liga x 1

Dutch Eredivisie x 4

Spanish Cup x 1

Dutch Cup x 3

German Cup x 1

Jose Mourinho

‘The Special One’ is the ultimate tactician, winning every major prize Europe has to offer, on occasion with largely inferior teams. His 2004 UEFA Champions League win with FC Porto, who entered the tournament as 100/1 rank outsiders will go down as one of the tournaments major shocks.

Honours

UEFA Champions League x 2

UEFA Cup x 1

FA Premier League x 2

Portuguese Primeira Liga x 2

Italian Serie A x 2

F.A. Cup x 1

English League Cup x 2

FA Community Shield x 1

Portuguese Cup x 1

Portuguese Super Cup x 1

Italian Cup x 1

Italian Super Cup x 1

Spanish Cup x 1

Bob Paisley

Inherited the reins at Liverpool after Bill Shankly’s shock retirement in 1974, Bob Paisley is the only manager to win three European Cups, although he’s never been knighted for his achievements, something that rankles with many Liverpool fans to this day. In total Paisley spent 46 unbroken years at Anfield as player, physio, coach, assistant manager and manager winning every trophy available apart from the FA Cup.

Bob Paisley - The only manager to win '3' European Cups.

Honours

European Cup x 3

UEFA Cup x 1

European Super Cup x 1

English First Division x 6

English League Cup x 3

FA Charity Shield x 5

Bill Shankly

“My idea was to build Liverpool into a bastion of invincibility. Napoleon had that idea. He wanted to conquer the bloody world. I wanted Liverpool to be untouchable. My idea was to build Liverpool up and up until eventually everyone would have to submit and give in.” Bill Shankly took Liverpool from the bottom of the Second division and established them as one of the best teams in the country winning 3 league titles, 2 FA Cups and a UEFA Cup. The colossal achievements of his successor Bob Paisley owe everything to the foundation that Shankly built.

Honours

UEFA Cup x 1

English First Division x 3

FA Cup x 2

FA Charity Shield x 4

English Second Division x 1

Jock Stein

Managed the first British side to ever win the European Cup, when his Celtic team achieved the feat in 1967, with a team of entirely home grown players. All of the starting XI had been born in Glasgow, even Barcelona can’t compete with that statistic. He also won 9 consecutive Scottish League titles as well as 15 domestic cups. He spent 45 days in England managing Leeds United, only one day more than Brian Clough managed.

Honours

European Cup x 1

Scottish League x 10

Scottish Cup x 9

Scottish League Cup x 6

I would really appreciate your comments below on who you think is the greatest and what criteria we should look at. Let’s open up the debate.


Euro ’96 – Then and now?


Euro ’96. In the collective English psyche it was the summer when football came home, when the Three Lions roared and Britannia seeped Cool from every pore.  Britpop snuggled up incestuously with Baddiel and Skinner, who topped the charts with ‘3 Lions’. Every England game at Wembley, inevitably, a sell-out and the loyal fans treated to a feast of beautiful, exciting football. Under the stewardship of Terry Venables, this was an admirably enlightened, flexible and relaxed England side, one for the modern age; they even played a genuine 3-5-2 with Darren Anderton and Steve McManaman marauding the wings, Paul Ince providing bite in midfield, the creativity of Paul Gascoigne feeding the lethal finishing of Alan Shearer.

But what became of the XI who started that semi final against Germany? All are now retired, sitting in dugouts or on comfy coaches offering their pearls of wisdom to a television audience. In fact, from the 22 man squad only Nicky Barmby, Sol Campbell and Phil Neville, comfortably into their twilight years, are still playing professional football. In this piece I take a look at England’s 11 Lions from that day and where they are now.

David Seaman

75 caps (1988-2002)

Arguably England’s finest ever goalkeeper and rated as Arsenal’s 7th best ever player, David Seaman called time on his illustrious career in 2004, after spells with Peterborough United, QPR, Birmingham City, Arsenal (564 appearances over 13 years) and Manchester City. Over his career Seaman won 3 League Championships, 4 F.A. Cups, 1 League and 1 Cup Winners Cup, all of which with Arsenal and was named goalkeeper of the tournament during Euro ’96.

He currently takes part in occasional reality tv shows and also hosts a “Safe Hands” charity golf event annually. Seaman has released two football themed dvds entitled David Seaman’s Goalkeeping Nightmares in 2003 and Jeepers Keepers in 2004.

After scoring 'that penalty' against Spain

Stuart Pearce

78 caps, 5 goals (1987-1999)

Stuart ‘Psycho’ Pearce retired from football in 2002 at the  ripe old age of 39 years old after a distinguished  career  which saw him make over 1000 club and international appearances. His most successful period  being his 13 years at Nottingham Forest where he made an impressive 522  appearances. Pearce’s  career defining moment came when he dispatched his spot kick in the Euro  ’96  shoot out against Spain, avenging the memory of his infamous miss at Italia  ’90, six years earlier. In a  2010 Daily Mail  poll, Pearce was voted England’s greatest ever.

Pearce is currently England U21 manager and assistant to Fabio Capello at senior level. He is also rumoured to be in line to manage the GB football team at the London 2012 Olympic Games.

Tony Adams (captain)

66 caps, 5 goals (1987-2000)

Tony Adams spent his entire playing career of 22 years at Arsenal and is considered one of the club’s greatest players of all time by the club’s own fansIn a 2008 poll by the clubs website he was voted their 3rd best ever player behind Thierry Henry and Dennis Bergkamp respectively. Adams is the only player to win the English League Championship in 3 decades (1989, 1991, 1998, 2002) as well as 3 FA Cups, 2 League Cups and a UEFA Cup Winners Cup. In total Adams made 669 appearances for Arsenal.

Adams is currently managing Gabala FC in Azerbaijan, where he guided them to 7th in his first full season in charge. This was preceded by unsuccessful stints as manager of Wycombe Wanderers and Portsmouth.

moments after missing England's crucial 6th penalty

Gareth Southgate

57 caps, 2 goals (1995-2004)        

Unfortunately for Gareth Southgate he will always be remembered for his tame penalty miss  against Germany that sent England crashing out of Euro’96, but he enjoyed a successful playing  career with Crystal Palace, Aston Villa and Middlesbrough. Notable achievements were League  Cup triumphs with Aston Villa in 1999 and Middlesbrough in 2004 (their 1st and only major  trophy).

Southgate was handed his first managerial role at Middlesbrough in June 2006 after  Steve  McClaren had left to manage England. He held the role for 3 three years, in which they suffered  relegation from the Premier League. He was sacked in October 2009 and replaced with Gordon  Strachan. In January 2011, Southgate was confirmed as the FA’s head of elite development, as  well as this he is co commentator and pundit for ITV’s football coverage, a role which he shares  with his Middlesbrough successor (also fired) Gordon Strachan.

Paul Ince

53 caps, 2 goals (1992-2000)

Paul Ince was one of the most tenacious and talented midfielders of his generation. One of a handful of successful English players to ply their trade abroad, where he had a very productive spell with Inter Milan and one of the few to play for, and be loved, by the fans of both Manchester United and Liverpool respectively. Ince was the first black player to captain England and was the first black Briton to manage a team in the top flight of a British league.

Since hanging up his boots, Ince has enjoyed a mixed bag when it comes to management. Successful spells with Macclesfield Town and MK Dons have been tapered by a poor showing at Blackburn Rovers and a second less successful stint with MK Dons. Ince is currently out of work after being sacked by his latest club Notts County for losing a club record 9 nine successive games.

Darren ‘Sicknote’ Anderton

30 caps, 7 goals (1994-2001)

Darren Anderton will always be remembered as a player with huge potential, that unfortunately suffered constant injuries that have become the stuff of legend. Multiple torn groin muscles, repeated torn Achilles tendons and hernia issues being his main and most repeat ailments that limited his career, but fortunately he often managed to get fit for major international championships and had successful tournaments for England during Euro ’96 and World Cup France ’98.

Anderton retired from professional football in 2008 with home town club Bournemouth after spells with Portsmouth, Tottenham Hotspurs, Birmingham City and Wolverhampton Wanderers. He has currently just finished working on his autobiography ‘Takenote!’.

David Platt

62 caps, 27 goals (1989-1996)

David Platt will be remembered as a goal scoring midfielder with a record at international level of nearly a goal every other game. His performances for Aston Villa and England earned him a move to Italy, where he had successful stints with Bari, Juventus and Sampdoria. When Platt came back to England to join Arsenal in 1995, the total fees spent on him surpassed £20m, making him the most expensive player in the world at the time.

Platt currently works as part of Roberto Mancini’s coaching team at Manchester City. The two played together at Sampdoria, where they forged a friendship and Mancini offered Platt a role shortly after getting the Manchester City job. Platt has had unsuccessful spells in management with England U21’s, Sampdoria and Nottingham Forest.

Steve McManaman

37 caps, 3 goals (1994-2001)

Steve McManaman is the most decorated player to play at any foreign club, in terms of trophies won overseas. Coming through the ranks at Liverpool, where McManaman spent 10 years winning an F.A Cup and a League Cup, McManaman moved to Real Madrid on a Bosman free transfer to join up with the ‘Galacticos’, playing alongside, in his time their – Zidane, Figo, Raul, Ronaldo, Beckham and Anelka. Although not always a regular starter ‘El Macca’ won over the Bernabeu and managed to pick up 2 La Liga titles, 2 Spanish Super Cups and 2 UEFA Champions League Winners medals. After 5 years in Madrid McManaman left to join Kevin Keegan at Manchester City where he spent two season before retiring.

After his retirement as a player in 2005, McManaman became a football pundit for Setanta Sports and was an associate producer on the film Goal 2. He currently works as an analyst for ESPN on their UK and US coverage where he covers Premier League, MLS and the international football.

Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne

The dentist chair celebration after 'that wonder goal' against Scotland.

57 caps, 10 goals (1988-1998)

Paul Gascoigne’s finest moments often came in an England shirt at major tournaments. At Italia ’90 he set the tournament alight with his vision, passing, skill and technical ability. Then later at Euro’96, where he scored the goal of the tournament his performances in central midfield were key to England’s progression in the competition. Gascoigne came through the ranks at boyhood club Newcastle United, before a move to Tottenham Hotspur in 1998, where he picked up a winners medal in the 1991 F.A.Cup final. Gascoigne received his medal in a hospital bed as he ruptured his knee ligaments early on in a ridiculous challenge on Nottingham Forest’s Gary Charles. In 1992 he moved to Lazio, before a successful spell at Glasgow Rangers from 1995-1998. In his later career he spent time at Middlesbrough, Everton, Burnley, Boston United and Gansu Tianma in China. Gascoigne had short, unsuccessful stint in management with Kettering Town, but vows to take his coaching badges and return to management at some point.

Gascoigne is currently fighting mental health and numerous addiction problems. In March 2011 In February 2011 Gascoigne was given six weeks to pay back £28,000 in taxes or face bankruptcy. No player has captured the hearts and minds of the British public before or since, not just because of his undoubted ability, but his charisma and vulnerability to match.

Teddy Sheringham

51 caps, 11 goals (1993-2002)

Teddy Sheringham played for 9 different clubs during his 26 year stint in professional football. Sheringham played as a forward, effortlessly linking the midfield and the forward line. He had a successful career at the club level, winning almost every domestic honour available with his clubs, most notably ‘The Treble’ with Manchester United in 1999. The pinnacle of his career came when he scored the equaliser and provided the assist for Manchester United’s winning goal in the 1999 UEFA Champions League final against Bayern Munich. Sheringham retired in 2008 after spells with Millwall, Aldershot, Djurgardens IF (Sweden), Nottingham Forest, Tottenham Hotspur (twice), Manchester United, Portsmouth, West Ham United and Colchester United. In his career he scored 354 goals in 898 appearances.

In 2009, non-league Kent side Beckenham Town announced they were in talks to sign Sheringham on a short term deal. The signing went through, but Sheringham never played a game, with the club later admitting that it was merely a publicity stunt.

Shearer celebrating scoring the opener against Germany in the Euro '96 Semi Final

Alan Shearer

63 caps, 30 goals (1992-2000)

Alan Shearer, widely considered one of England’s greatest ever strikers, finest moment came during Euro’ 96. Shearer finished the tournament as top goalscorer, winning the coveted ‘Golden Boot’. His 5 goals at the tournament led to boyhood club Newcastle United investing a world record fee of £15m, to take Shearer from Blackburn Rovers back to the North East. Shearer spent 10 years with Newcastle, unfortunately never managing to win the trophy he dreamed of for his local club. Shearer is the Premier League all time record goalscorer with 260 goals, a cool 73 clear of his nearest rival Andy Cole and 111 clear of the next player still playing Michael Owen. He is also the record goalscorer for Newcastle United with 206 goals. During his career he won 1 Premier League title with Blackburn Rovers in 1995 and won the ‘PFA Players Player of the Year’ award twice, as well as the ‘Football Writers Footballer of the Year’ award once.

Shearer currently works as a pundit for the BBC, regularly appearing on Match of the Day, although he is actively looking for management work since his short spell as Newcastle United boss. He has been heavily linked over the past year with vacancies at Sheffield Wednesday and Cardiff City.

Please leave your comments below